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Family work ethic in DNA of Donald Kay’s golf game

Patrick Henry High's Donald Kay on Wednesday will compete in the State Championships in golf for the second time in three years.
(Chadd Cady / San Diego Union-Tribune)
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When Phlec Kay came to the United States in 1980 as a Cambodian refugee escaping the brutal Khmer Rouge regime, he was 17 years old, had no money, and couldn’t speak English.

He learned to make donuts, and that led to a livelihood that has supported his family for more than three decades.

On Wednesday, Kay will hoof it up and down the steep terrain of the Poppy Hills Golf Club, intently following his son, Donald, who at 17 will never know the hardships of his father, but certainly understands where humble, hard work can get you.

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For the second time in three years, Kay is competing among the best high school golfers in the CIF State Championships. He birdied the last hole to shoot even-par 72 and emerged from a five-man playoff for three spots in last week’s SoCal Regional at Brookside in Pasadena.

The State Championships are a one-round sprint, with Torrey Pines High returning to try to defend its state title, while Kay and Valhalla junior Cameron Sisk are representing their schools as individuals.

Two years ago as sophomore, Kay stumbled at state with a 78 at Poppy, but he is far better equipped now. At 5-feet-10, he is three inches taller, 20 pounds heavier and has seven top-10 finishes, including a victory, in 10 career starts on the SCPGA’s Toyota Tour Cup series.

Last summer, Kay fulfilled a dream by earning a scholarship from coach Casey Martin to play at the University of Oregon beginning in the fall. The Ducks won the NCAA title last year and will play Oklahoma on Wednesday in the match play final of this year’s championship.

Donald’s older brother by three years, Lloyd, is a former standout junior golfer who is studying at Grossmont College with an eye toward UC San Diego and a medical career.

“I’m really amazed at how well they’re doing, how much they’ve accomplished,” Phlec Kay said. “I think we’ve surrounded them with good family, and they’ve been instilled with a good work ethic, and a good attitude toward life.”

Phlec Kay fled Cambodia with his father, mother, two brothers and three sisters, in the midst of a civil war in which millions died. They escaped through the jungle first to Thailand, where they spent a year, and later to the Philippines.

Kay’s mother died in a refugee camp, but the rest of the family made it to America, settling first in Orange County.

“It was something we’d never dreamed of – coming to America,” Phlec Kay, 55, said. “But you can never tell what tomorrow will bring.”

Soon after arriving, Kay followed a family friend to his work at a donut shop and studied the process.

“I thought that maybe this was something I could do,” he said. “It’s pretty simple. You put in the flour and water, mix it, and that’s it. Then flip it when it’s brown. That’s how I got started.”

Several years later Phlec Kay and his brother put together $3,000 to buy a struggling donut shop in Buena Park, and that start led them to buying and selling numerous shops through the years. Today, Phlec Kay and his wife, Ly, operate a bagel and bakery eatery in La Jolla.

Donald Kay remembers his parents rising at 3 a.m. on the weekends to work.

“It just made me want to work as hard as them,” Donald said.

The parents’ work schedule was fateful in a way because it led to the Kay boys being cared for by neighbors when they were younger. In their neighborhood close to San Diego State, they call Warren Kanagy “grandpa,” and while they were at his house Donald and Lloyd first saw the Golf Channel.

They asked if they could go to the driving range, and Kanagy took them to Mission Trails. They got hooked, and that eventually led them to play and study every day at the First Tee Pro Kids Academy at Colina Park.

“My second home. Without Pro Kids, I don’t think I’d be playing golf,” said Donald, who played until dark each day with friends such as Norman Xiong.

Xiong was a highly successful junior golfer who goes to Oregon and was the Pac-12’s Freshman of the Year this season. It was Xiong who told Martin about Kay, who didn’t compete in many national AJGA events and was playing well under the radar.

In the first tournament Martin saw Kay play, he finished second, though Kay has still had to get past the perception that he’s going to be a Duck because he’s a friend of Xiong’s.

“That really shook me at first,” Kay said. “So I was off my game. But once I won on the Toyota Cup Tour, I got my confidence back. I showed them why Casey chose me.”

The only other university Kay considered was SDSU. “Too close to home,” said Kay, adding that Aztecs coach Ryan Donovan’s office is a 10-minute walk from his house.

Gary McMinn, the golf coach at Patrick Henry, said of Kay’s game, “The guy is a really good driver of the ball. He rarely misses a fairway. That is the strength of his game. Plus, he’s a good putter. He’s just an all-around good player.”

Nurtured first by teacher Rick Johnson at Pro Kids, Kay has been working of late with swing coach Michael Stocking at Encinitas Ranch and putting guru Derek Uyeda at The Grand Del Mar.

Phlec Kay marvels at his son’s accomplishments and jokes that he could have never set Donald on the golf path.

“I caddied for him, and I didn’t know what a birdie was. The first time someone said, ‘That’s an eagle,’ I said, ‘Where?’ “ Phlec Kay said with an uproarious laugh.

He will watch his son on Wednesday with better knowledge and a greater appreciation.

“As a parent, you are proud of your kids’ accomplishments,” he said. “This dad is no exception.”

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tod.leonard@sduniontribune.com; Twitter: @sdutleonard

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